Chick Tract Review: The Little Ghost

Jack Chick sez: “I’m not afraid of you… because Jesus loves me!” The simple Gospel for young children.

Boring. No druids. No witches. No black mass and cat sacrifice. And not a single murdered child to be seen. Come on, Jack! Where’s your Halloween spirit?

The Little Ghost tells an incredibly gripping and exciting story about a couple of little kids who dress up in costumes and try to scare their friend. She tells them she’s not scared because Jesus loves her. Amazingly, her two friends have never heard of Jesus, so she tells them how He died for our sins and made the devil angry. Her friends are moved by her compelling and totally plausible narrative, and they invite Jesus into their hearts. The end. Seriously.

So if it’s such a snore, why bother reviewing it? I’m glad you asked, Gretchen. Apparently Chick realized that devoting an entire comic to a little girl talking about Jesus wouldn’t exactly capture the hearts and minds of the children and Tea Party members that make up his audience, so he decided to spice it up with some wacky marginalia. So while the nameless little girl is yammering on about Jesus and the mean ol’ devil, we the readers are treated to some comedy hijinks involving a cat, a dog, a mouse, and a moth.

Here we see a little boy named Joey dressed as a spooky ghost who looks as if he just grabbed his little friend’s boob. But what’s this? In the lower right corner, we see a misshapen kitty stalking a moth through the dandelions!

As Joey explains the intricacies of his costume to his strident little chum, the cat pounces! Meanwhile, a mouse surreptitiously makes its way to Joey’s Halloween bucket. Whole lot going on here, folks. Yep.

Another nameless tyke shows up all Satanically bedecked and declares himself to be the DEVIL! And in a startling plot twist, a vicious dog with a bat wing growing out of its ass shows up! Oblivious to the weighty spiritual matters being discussed by the children, the “dog” focuses all of its hate on the cat. Because dogs and cats are natural enemies. I learned it from watching all those documentaries on the Cartoon Network.

The cat takes refuge behind Joey the ghost, and the dog responds by biting the devil kid’s tail. And, for some reason, standing on two legs. Hell, I’m not sure what exactly is going on here, but I’m guessing that maybe the dog is “marking” devil child. That would certainly explain that look of glazed shock in his eyes. Meanwhile, the mouse peers out of the eyehole of Joey’s Halloween bucket. Maybe it wants to hear more about Jesus.

The little hippie girl wraps up her song, which so moves devil kid that he tosses away his mask and pitchfork. The dog can only stare aghast as the wicked mask falls to the ground. But fortunately, its attention has been diverted from the cat, which is now making its way up Joey’s back by digging its claws into his kidneys.

And man, does that dog hate the devil! I’m starting to suspect that devil kid used to put on that mask before beating the poor dog with a pillowcase full of oranges. As the dog growls and tears into the demonic mask, the girl talks about how Jesus came from heaven to save us from the devil. So perhaps the crazed dog is supposed to be a metaphor for Jesus? Because dog spelled backwards is… well, anyway the cat climbed down off of Joey, so at least he’s got that going for him.

The vicious cat suddenly lunges for the dog, while the mouse makes its escape. If the dog is a metaphor for Jesus, then I’m assuming Chick meant for the cat to represent gay Catholic scientists. Or maybe I’m totally misunderstanding the narrative flow here. It’s entirely possible that the dog, cat and mouse are all fleeing in terror because they’re all so horrified by what Joey looks like under his sheet. Or maybe this is the pamphlet Chick was working on when he had one of his strokes. Either way, that’s pretty much it for the crazy animal action in The Little Ghost until…

…they bow their heads along with the kids and ask Christ into their hearts. At least, the cat and dog do. No idea what happened to the mouse or the moth, but they’re probably in hell or Muslims or something.

So… yeah.

Published in: on October 26, 2010 at 8:55 pm  Leave a Comment  
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